In Moderation

I wake up. Somehow I feel like I shouldn't be witnessing 11 am today. Head hurts a bit. Legs even more. I sit at the computer. 15 new emails! Someone's popular. I do a quick scan. 2 emails from people I know. The rest? Well... If I wanted to consolidate my student loans, lengthen my penis, meet singles in my area, pay of my debts, legally walk away from those bills or get a free condoms sampler, then today would be my lucky day.